Every divorce follows its own course and is as unique as the unique circumstances involved, but there are certain common errors that can negatively impact your divorce terms and are well worth avoiding.
Because protecting your parental and financial rights throughout the divorce process is paramount, you shouldn’t wait to consult with an experienced Round Rock divorce attorney.
Your Divorce
Divorce is the legal process that puts an end to the marriage contract, and there is a wide range of legal intricacies involved. In the process, however, you are also walking away from a primary relationship, which means you are facing a serious transition that is bound to come with emotional fallout.
In other words, you are facing difficulties ahead. Knowing the errors that are most likely to trip you up as you journey forward can help you avoid them and can help keep your case on the straight and narrow.
The fewer challenges you face in your divorce case, the less costly and time-consuming you can expect it to be – both of which are worthy goals. When you have skilled legal guidance in your corner, you can rest easy in the knowledge that you are far less likely to fall victim to some of the divorce traps that often ensnare others.
Failing to Be Honest
Your divorce terms will be based on the unique circumstances involved in your case, which will be established through the documentation that each of you share during the discovery phase. If you provide information that isn’t true, it can come back to haunt you in ways you may not have even imagined.
The court takes a very dim view of parties to divorce who aren’t forthcoming, and they can rule accordingly.
When you’re filling out court documents, creating affidavits, or testifying in court, being absolutely truthful is always required. In fact, failure to do so could even lead to fraud charges, and this is not to mention that failing to be truthful has the potential to negatively affect the division of your marital property and your parenting time schedule.
While you may not be super proud of everything you have done in the buildup to your divorce, it’s, nevertheless, important to be honest with your dedicated divorce attorney – who is tasked with building your strongest claim as well as doing any damage control that may be required.
You’re going through a divorce, which can leave you feeling especially vulnerable, but now is not the time to clam up – there is too much riding on you being forthcoming with your attorney and honest with the court.
Focusing on Revenge
You and your spouse are divorcing, which is a pretty good sign that you are not on great terms with one another. The divorce process, however, is not the time to exact your revenge.
In fact, seeking revenge isn’t the right thing to do in relation to your shared children and to your own emotional well-being. A better use of your time is putting your efforts into finding closure and embracing the post-divorce future that lies ahead.
It’s far more important to secure divorce terms that support your parental and financial rights than it is to get back at your soon-to-be ex. Instead of focusing on all the ways your spouse did you wrong or hurt you, which – admittedly – may be considerable, put your shoulder into effecting solid terms that work for you and your children.
If you are consumed by anger, it can interfere with your ability to focus on the important divorce work ahead. In other words, your inability to put your anger aside is far more likely to hurt you than it is to have an effect on your divorcing spouse. Divorce is a messy process, and keeping your cool throughout can make a serious difference in how your case is resolved.
Driving a Wedge between Your Children and Their Other Parent
The State of Texas bases its child custody determinations on the best interests of the children involved, and they begin with the following presumptions:
Children are better off when they spend a significant amount of time with and continue to have a close relationship with each parent, which relate to physical custody or parenting time.
Parents know what’s best for their children and, therefore, have the authority to make primary decisions on their behalf, which relates to legal custody.
Only if there is a serious reason for ruling outside these presumptions will either parent’s parenting time or decision-making authority be limited. One factor, however, that could directly impact your parental rights is any form of child abuse, and parental alienation is identified as a form of emotional child abuse in Texas.
Your children love their other parent and need them in their lives, and attempting to drive a wedge between them will hurt your children and your case. Actions like the following can be classified as parental alienation:
Bad mouthing your divorcing spouse in front of your children
Putting your children in the middle of your divorce by using them as go-betweens or as a means of communicating with their other parent
Asking your children to take sides
Denying your children court-ordered visitation with their other parent
Withholding important information about your children from their other parent
Confiding information about your marital relationship or your divorce to your children
Withdrawing your own affection toward your children in an effort to sway their allegiance
Limiting your children’s contact and communication with their other parent
Scrubbing all traces of your divorcing spouse from your children’s primary home or from their rooms
Sending your children on spy missions in which they’re required to bring back information about their other parent’s life
Referencing your children’s other parent by their first name rather than as mom or dad
Making your children believe that their other parent is dangerous, frightening, or bad
Divorce is an adult problem that is hard enough for your children to handle. The last thing you want to do is make the situation more painful for them.
The bottom line is that interfering with your children’s relationship with their other parent causes serious harm, and putting serious effort into not falling prey to this trap is always well advised.
Yes, you’re angry at your divorcing spouse, and no one blames you for that, but sharing this anger with your children isn’t appropriate. There are far better resources available that can provide you with much more effective support, including each of the following:
Close family members
Trusted friends
A compassionate member of the clergy at your place of worship
A professional counselor
Accessing the support you need can help you process your feelings and move past them as you set your sights on a new beginning.
Disrespecting Your Divorcing Spouse’s Privacy
In Texas, each member of a divorcing couple has important privacy rights that shouldn’t be crossed. This protects each of you from what is considered unfair interference in your privacy. The fact that you’re married, however, makes the issue somewhat slippery.
In Texas, you have the right to gather evidence in your divorce case, but you’re also required to strike a balance regarding your spouse’s privacy, which amounts to a very fine line. The law prohibits highly offensive intrusions on your spouse’s privacy, which includes unlawfully accessing their private correspondence and social media accounts.
At the same time, it’s a mistake not to safeguard your own privacy, which includes taking all the following actions:
Changing your passwords if your spouse knows yours or could likely guess them
Enabling two-factor authentication
Using secure messaging apps
Keep in mind that there is no true privacy online. One simple screenshot and a message or post that was intended to disappear or be deleted can live on forever.
Social media has opened us up to entirely new vulnerabilities in the face of divorce. Because the information in your social media accounts can be subpoenaed in your case, it’s also important to take each of the following precautions to heart while your divorce is pending:
Staying off social media entirely is the best practice.
Don’t post about your divorce, and refrain from making any negative comments about your soon-to-be ex or their family members.
Don’t post photos, comments, or statements that are open to interpretation – and remember that just about everything is open to interpretation.
Failing to Follow Temporary Orders
At the time that you file for divorce, you or your spouse may seek temporary orders that are designed to address matters like parenting time schedules, child support, and spousal maintenance while your case is pending.
For example, if your spouse earns considerably more than you do, you may need temporary alimony to cover your expenses, and if your children are living primarily with you, you’ll also likely need temporary child support orders. Although these are temporary orders that only apply until your divorce terms are finalized, they remain court orders that are legally binding.
This means that you and your divorcing spouse must follow each of the temporary orders that are handed down in your case. For example, if you’re entitled to temporary child support, your children’s other parent is required to make the payments according to the provisions set by the court.
Further, if you have a temporary parenting time schedule in place, you’ll need to ensure that your shared children are available to your spouse when it’s their allotted time.
Running Up Bills Prior to Divorce
Another common divorce mistake is running up a lot of debt after filing for divorce but prior to its finalization. You are each entitled to spend what you need to reasonably spend in order to keep your households running while your divorce proceeds, but the court is very likely to take issue if you do any spending beyond this level.
Texas courts are well acquainted with the idea of piling on debt in order to deplete the marital estate and, in the process, taking more for yourself, and it can be categorized as fraud on the marital estate.
The Best Path Forward
When it comes to divorce, the best path forward involves working closely with your formidable divorce attorney – who will leave no stone unturned in their efforts to protect your rights and to ensure that you bypass the pitfalls that, too often, harm clients’ cases. The basics include:
Being honest with your attorney and ensuring that they have the information necessary to better protect your rights
Treating your ex with respect across the board, which includes not posting about them on social media
Prioritizing your children’s well-being, which includes protecting them from the ugly parts of your divorce
Getting the help you need to ensure that your emotional pain does not spill out into other areas of your life, including your parenting
Focusing on negotiating your divorce terms rather than on blaming your soon-to-be ex – however much they may deserve it
Forgoing any attempts to artificially alter the size of your marital estate
Honoring your spouse’s privacy while safeguarding your own
Divorce is unpredictable, but taking these steps can make it less so—and being proactive in this way paves the path toward a brighter future for you and your children.
Call an Experienced Round Rock Divorce Attorney for the Help You Are Looking For
Brett Pritchard at The Law Office of Brett H. Pritchard is a reputable Round Rock divorce attorney who takes great pride in his impressive track record of successfully defending his valued clients’ rights. He welcomes the opportunity to serve you, too.
For more information about what we can do to help you, please don’t delay contacting or calling us at 254-781-4222 to schedule a free consultation today.