Determining that you need a divorce and following through by filing is never easy, but for most couples, it signals that their marriage is coming to an end. Some couples, however, have a change of heart somewhere along the way and reconcile before their cases are finalized, and some divorced couples remarry.
If you and your divorcing spouse are rekindling the strong emotions that brought you together as a couple in the first place, it’s not too late to stop your divorce in its tracks. There are, however, important considerations to take into account.
Divorce is a complex legal matter that directly affects your rights, which makes having the trusted legal representation of an experienced Round Rock divorce lawyer in your corner from the start well-advised.
The Divorce Process in Texas
Before you turn your divorce around, it’s important to know how the divorce process works in the State of Texas.
In order to initiate your divorce, one of you must have filed an original petition for divorce, which was then either served to the other spouse or exchanged with them – if they signed a waiver of service. This begins the divorce process, and at this point, the court sets hearing dates and applicable deadlines.
The further along your divorce is when you decide to have your case dismissed, the more challenges and potential financial losses you are likely to face. If you and your spouse, however, are both committed to making your marriage work, the best plan is to tell your dedicated divorce attorney about your decision as soon as possible.
Having Your Texas Divorce Petition Dismissed
If you do choose to dismiss your divorce filing, there is a process that you’ll need to follow.
Filing a Motion to Dismiss
In order to have your petition for divorce dismissed, you’ll need to file a motion to dismiss with the same court that is handling your divorce. In this motion, you must inform the court that you and your spouse are in agreement on the matter of halting the divorce process.
If your divorce is identified as contested, which means that you and your spouse were not in agreement regarding at least one of the applicable terms, you’ll both need to sign the motion. If, however, your divorce is uncontested, only the spouse who originally filed for divorce will likely be required to sign.
Obtaining the Court’s Approval
Once you’ve filed a motion to dismiss in relation to your divorce, the court handling your case will review your motion. As long as the court has no pressing reason to proceed with the divorce and as long as you and your spouse are both in agreement on the matter, the judge will – as a matter of routine – dismiss your case.
Finalizing Your Divorce Dismissal
Once the judge handling your divorce dismissal issues an order to dismiss, your original divorce petition will be officially withdrawn, which will bring the divorce process to an end. At this point, all legal deadlines, hearing dates, and requirements associated with your case will be canceled.
If Your Divorce Has Already Been Finalized
You should know that while you can dismiss a divorce filing at any point during the process, your ability to do so generally ends at the point that your divorce is finalized.
Even if your divorce decree is what brings you and your now-ex to your senses, there typically is no going back. At this point, the only path forward as a married couple typically involves going through the legal marriage process again.
Sorting Out Your Feelings
Strong feelings guided you and your spouse to marriage in the first place, and something just as strong likely caused you to file for divorce. The emotional upheaval that comes with divorce can generate a considerable amount of soul-searching, and sometimes, this emotional journey causes couples to reconsider.
If your decision to file for divorce was based on a one-time event, such as an infidelity or a heated argument that got out of hand, or if it was made in anger that has since subsided, you may be having second thoughts and that is your prerogative.
Ultimately, only you and your spouse know what’s right for the two of you, but if you’re considering or preparing to dismiss your divorce filing, it’s a good idea to be sure.
Toward this end, meeting with a marriage counselor or a professional who serves in a similar capacity is an excellent plan. In the end, sorting out your feelings in the middle of an emotionally charged divorce in which you’re considering reuniting is a tall order, and addressing the issue head-on with the help of a trained professional can afford you the peace of mind that comes from knowing you’re making a well-considered decision that reflects you and your spouse’s wishes.
The Reconciliation Statistics
According to Psychology Today, reconciling mid-divorce and even remarrying post-divorce is not as uncommon as you may think. Consider the following statistics shared:
From 10 to 15 percent of couples get back together after separating.
About 6 percent of divorced couples remarry one another.
About 30 percent of those who remarry each other after divorce go on to divorce a second time, which is considerably lower than the overall divorce rate for second marriages.
The primary reason for reconciliation is identified as recognizing and resolving the issues that the separation or divorce was based upon. Common issues include financial worries, diminished intimacy, and mental health concerns such as addiction.
Other couples are drawn back together by the deep romantic feelings they share for one another. A mutual commitment to family or couples therapy helps many couples make their second marriages to one another stick.
Taking Relevant Factors into Consideration
Before you flip the switch on your divorce, there are several factors you’ll need to consider.
Your Children’s Emotions
If you and your spouse share children, it’s important to take their feelings and emotions into careful consideration. If you’ve already begun the divorce process, your children are very likely experiencing significant emotional turmoil of their own – which simply goes hand in hand with divorce.
While telling them that you and their other parent have changed your mind on the matter is likely to afford your children immense relief, it can also be confusing, and if you do proceed with divorce at a later date, it can prove that much more painful.
The bottom line is that your children look to you for love, support, and guidance, and if you’re finding it difficult to make primary decisions in your own life, it can leave your kids wary about your ability to guide them through the challenges ahead.
When you filed for divorce, you knew that doing so would be extremely hard on your children, but you thought it was the right thing to do. Changing your mind at this juncture is a jolting departure from the course that you set in motion, which makes proceeding with caution the best course of action.
Before you put your children’s minds at ease with the happy news that your divorce is off, take the time you need to be certain about your decision.
Your Own Emotions
While we’re on the topic of emotions, it’s also important to take your own feelings into account. Divorce is often described as an emotional rollercoaster for a range of very good reasons.
When you’re in the middle of a divorce, it can be difficult to assess how you’re actually feeling. For example, you may be going through a fleeting period of nostalgia or may be rewriting history a bit in the face of everything you’re going through.
Sit with your feelings for a while in order to translate their true meaning in your life. It’s also important to communicate freely and frankly with your spouse. If you both come to the conclusion that your original decision to divorce was misguided, and you’re both fully committed to saving your marriage, you’ll have your answer.
If, on the other hand, you can’t reach any kind of consensus on the matter, your original filing may be a better reflection of what’s really going on.
Financial Considerations
Dismissing your divorce filing now means that you’ll need to start over if you do choose to divorce at a later date. If that happens, you’ll not only face the considerable emotional upset that goes along with divorce but will also need to slog through the logistical and financial challenges associated with maintaining separate households and finalizing your case.
In addition, there are the court filing costs and the legal expenses that you’ve already paid and will need to pay again to consider.
Questions to Ask Yourself Before Dismissing Your Divorce Case
If you’re considering filing a motion to dismiss your divorce case, there are several important questions you should ask yourself before proceeding.
Have you considered the emotional calculus involved?
Divorce comes with cascading emotional consequences that many people would prefer to avoid at all costs. If you and your spouse’s motivation for calling off your divorce has more to do with bypassing the emotional strain involved than it does with your mutual and genuine desire to make your marriage work, you might be delaying the inevitable.
Have you resolved the underlying issues?
You didn’t file for divorce on a whim, and dismissing the case that you put a lot of careful consideration into without thinking it through isn’t a great plan either. Something about your relationship caused you to seek a divorce, and if nothing has changed in response to that concern, it’s very unlikely to simply go away.
Putting some effort into addressing the root cause of your divorce helps set the stage for a smoother path forward if you do remain married.
Are you and your spouse both all in?
If you and your spouse are both on the same page about pulling the plug on the divorce you set in motion, you’ll be far better positioned to make it work. If, on the other hand, one of you is gung-ho while the other remains on the fence, you can expect serious challenges ahead.
Marriage, as you know, is a lot of work, and it requires a tremendous team effort. If your spouse isn’t willing to hold up their end, your original decision to file for divorce may have been the right move.
Are your motives emotional rather than financial?
If the reason you are prepared to fight for your marriage is based solely on the strong feelings that you and your spouse have for one another, you’re on the right track. If, on the other hand, you’re motivated by financial reasons, you’ve got a flimsy foundation that is less likely to hold.
Yes, divorce is costly, and you will both walk away with less than you had when you were together, but this isn’t a great premise on which to base a marriage and is unlikely to fix whatever drove you to file for divorce in the first place.
It’s Time to Consult with an Experienced Round Rock Divorce Attorney
When you married, you did not see divorce on the horizon, and if you are considering having your divorce filing dismissed, it can come as even more of a surprise. Ultimately, close relationships like marriage are complicated, and decisions regarding the state of your union are for you and your spouse to determine.
If, however, you are interested in learning more about what divorce could mean for you or if you and your spouse have decided you no longer want to pursue a divorce, Brett Pritchard at The Law Office of Brett H. Pritchard is a dedicated Round Rock divorce attorney who understands your predicament and will do what it takes to help you find the right path forward for you.
Learn more by contacting or calling us at 254-781-4222 and scheduling a free consultation today.